Had a conversation with a close friend who has been very active in fighting for gay equality. His husband is quite a bit younger than he is and looks at life through a different prism because he hasn’t experienced the same prejudices in his life. It has been a bit jarring to my friend how different their experiences have been growing up gay in Florida. This is not to say that we are anywhere near an endpoint to the movement but to acknowledge that quite a bit of progress has been made.
Which brought up the question (in general and not to any one movement): when do social movements end? Is there a point at which you realize that you’ve achieved what you set out for and stop fighting?
The 'litmus test' for me was when some, a minority but still some, gay couples were defending the stance of the Christian bakery.
The overwhelming supermajority just wanted their legal equality, the end to all of the issues most people don't realize that unmarried people have to deal with (especially legal ones), and now that they have achieved that, they are just interest in their life, privacy and other things. So a subset of those couples are now speaking out against the
"don't be @$$holes" segment, as well as the ones that see the "slippery slope" of confusing
"discrimination" with
"taste."
"Discrimination" can be legally argued. "Taste" cannot be.
I most definitely think that there is still LOTS of room for improvement on how gays are viewed in society, however, I also can appreciate and realize how far we've come, even from when I first came out.
The best way to change people is inclusion. The fact that we're still labeling other people, and still calling "insensitivity" as "racism," "sexism," and "homophobia" or other "discrimination" is part of the problem.
It's at the point that there is a huge backlash building ... even among gay couples too.
Then there's the transgender issue. The overwhelming supermajority support medical procedures for Americans who serve their country. The costs are minor in the grand scheme of things.
But then President Obama commuted Manning's sentence ... that was the stupidest thing he could have ever done, and smacked of special interest. I don't have a single LGBT colleague (especially those who have served, or been in cleared positions) that disagree with me either, but to the US media masses, they got the story as Manning as a hero, and a victim of the military.
I mean, at least Snowden drew a line where he said his ethics were, whether people agree or not, whether he was protected by whistleblowing, or not. Manning did similarly early on, with select videos and releases ... but then just dumped the f'ing cables because Manning, ultimately, was an @$$hole without care.
I warned anyone calling for Manning's sentence to be commuted that it was ill advised, and they really shouldn't be making the argument that he, now she, was being 'mistreated.' She was already receiving medical procedures at taxpayer's expense, and more attention didn't need to be brought to that, as it would undermine those who are considered the exact opposite of traitors.
When I first came out, I was actually called names and yelled at by full grown adults. If that happened now, I'd be pretty shocked. It of course depends on where you are. If you're in an urban center - the chances of experiencing prejudice are pretty low. That's definitely not the case everywhere though.
Even here in Alabama, it's pretty Progressive now. If you get far south enough, probably not (and parts of the Florida panhandle for that matter. But Birmingham, let alone Huntsville?
The only thing in Alabama that still stands is that Democratic voters are often pro-2nd Amendment, and Progressives cannot turn them like they did Harry Reid. Other than that, there is a good mix of Conservatives that have no problem with the LGBT community ... as long as the LGBT don't judge Christians as 'their enemy.'
There are many counties where gays can marry, and other counties that don't want to just don't offer any marriage licenses at all. I don't agree with all Alabama laws (try to order a sex toy by mail -- look it up), but a lot of the legacy issues are gone. Why?
Birmingham has boomed, and Huntsville has long been tech central with a lot of PhDs.
California is the most racist state I've been too (heavy, anti-Asian ... and utter disregard for the Golden Rule in general among the entitled) and DC is the most sexist entity I've ever been in (don't get me started). Both of them are Democratic strongholds, sadly enough.
I do find it annoying when people whine at EVERYTHING though. I get fighting for your rights and to be treated the same but there most definitely is a point where one needs to realize you have it okay right now. Don't stop striving to make things better but don't be combative and nitpick.
Picking battles. Yes, it gets old when people 'drown out' important issues with petty non-sense.
It's actually what undermines Progressives with Conservatives, and vice-versa.
I honestly don't know where that line is though. I'm sure it's different for everyone, how they grew up, what they've experienced. I know where my line is and I live by that.
